i am exhausted, but not asleep.
i do not know why.
i was able to sleep late today, but that is not entirely unheard of for a sunday, although it has been a few weeks. when i get the chance i sleep until my eyes gradually open on their own (today it was around 4). i then accomplish things around the house and neighborhood, do some homework, make lists for the week, and go back to sleep around midnight.
i went through the routine today. curled in bed just after midnight. had amadeus on softly and saturated myself in phoebe glockner's diary of a teenage girl (i love her love her love her). and then, amadeus is over, it's almost four, and i'm halfway through the book.
so i take a bath, hair up so i don't get too cold, candle balanced on my left tit to read by. soak until the water loses warmth and my toes look like peanut shells.
now i'm back in bed. i have begun my fall back regimen of royal tenenbaums and book (no offense to royal tenenbaums, i love the film, in fact, because i have watched it so often i find it very soothing, and not just because angelica houston is the perfect woman and danny glover has a satin voice).
if i were really committed i would switch from phoebe to school texts (the harlem reader this week). sure to fall deep asleep. but i have to be at work around nine anyway, which means getting on the subway at eight, and waking up around seven. what's the point?
aside from the fact that i have class until ten tonight, and then should really do my laundry. but everyday this week is booked from 8am to 11pm roundtrip. i'm looking forward to relaxing in the mountains in north carolina over thanksgiving. the last time i was there, it really helped me get back into the rhythm (my ceramics and fire spinning showed dramatic improvement upon my return). until then, i turn back to phoebe and the tenenbaums.