Sunday, May 22, 2005

dirty dishes and naked ladies

i have had a lovely weekend.

after running around between therapy, psychiatry (my final appointment), and physical therapy, i took a nap on dacia's couch. after waking at 5:30, realized it would be hell to drive home during rush hour, so we ordered sushi to kill time. dacia then came over to my house to help clean my room for the lovely lady that would be spending the night.

on the ride over we had a classic exchange:

jane: i want a car the color of that van.
dacia: sea foam green?
jane: no, more of a turquoise. that would rock.
dacia: i had a friend with a periwinkle car. he wasn't gay. now he's married with a kid and a dog.
jane: loser. not that there's anything wrong with that.
dacia: of course.
jane: omigod, that was so illegal! that van just crossed the double white lines. not even a single solid line, but a double.
dacia: because we have so much respect for the sanctity of the law.
jane: except for the whoring.

and then we laughed until we cried. because we are awesome. if only to each other.

dacia made my bed with clean sheets while i cleaned my room. then we went to ellen's 30th birthday party (she's old but she's awesome). there was a great deal of food and many more people. i planted myself on the couch and was joined by friends and acquaintances.

dacia and i held our breath when rachel entered the room. look at those stockings. look at those shoes. look at those boobs. she looked edible.

as the night wore on my eye began to twitch. then water. then the other. and i began to sneeze. i waited in line for the bathroom (which i am convinced was actually a locked closet) until it became apparent i needed to leave. dacia and rachel were kind enough to follow me out although i had offered to come back around in an hour to drive them home. we sat in traffic on the bqe and dashed through the cold to dacia's apartment. after a chat and trip to the loo, rachel and i took the scenic route back to my place.

we dove under the covers and kept each other warm through the chilly night. with a slow awakening, and debated breakfast offers (i though she asked for "e" when requesting "eggs"), we got down to the business my hand - specifically, my dishes. in a lovely purple bra and matching panties and black strappy heels, rachel washed my dishes with gusto. the girl lovingly soaped and rinsed every plate, bowl, and cup. i stared at the beautiful woman in my kitchen as i dried, occasionally brushing the hair from her face.

we decided to forgo the chicken and dumplings in favor of naked tumbling in my bed. sadly, friday's physical therapy left me in a state of old lady. the aching of my thighs (compared to the throbbing of my loins) limited my mobility significantly. i could either lie on my back or my stomach. we managed regardless. use your imaginations. we had to. although i have to say i love a girl who knows when to ask for the lube.

after a nap i drove her home, finished my essay (which i hope they enjoy), and wrote my bio for wysiwig (june 21st, 7pm, PS 122, tickets available at then headed off to the new york burlesque festival i have been trying to go to the burlesque festival for three years. last year i was at a conference and the year before i was underage (by less than a month), but this year, after a wait in the rain, they finally let me in. there were some great routines, some poor prop choices, and an amazing band. I am in love with little brooklyn, have a crush on "coco de la creme" (at least i thought that was her name), and want to lick the ass of both of the wet spots.

i may have a chance with that last one monday night at otto's shrunken head, where they will be singing hilarious sex positive songs like "i'd really like to come" and "do you take it in the ass?" come out and play.


Blogger Librarian Babe said...

I look forward to seeing the Wet Spots with you and the gang... but Jane - you do realize you deserve a good spanking for calling 30 "old."

Your 32 year old friend :-)

5/23/2005 12:00 AM  
Blogger My secret life said...

I'm a 33-year old bisexual former escort who's FROM NYC, but currently, temporarily, living in Los Angeles (heaven). I'm a new reader, and a VERY big fan of yours!

More interested in women. I look like Trinity, from The Matrix. 5'5", 36B, 120#, short brown hair and blue eyes. Would it be TOO sassy to ask for your picture?

Meredith Fisher

5/23/2005 4:04 PM  

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